Cocktails 1 oz elderflower cordial
1 oz Bombay Sapphire® gin
1 oz Cinzano® dry vermouth
1/2 oz lime juice
Money
Business
Information
An accountant is having a hard time sleeping
and goes to see
his doctor. "Doctor, I just can't get to sleep at
night."
"Have you tried counting sheep?"
"That's the
problem - I make a mistake and then spend three hours
trying to find
it."
A patient was at her doctor's office after
undergoing a complete physical exam. The doctor said, "I have some
very grave
news for you. You only have six months to
live."
The patient asked, "Oh doctor, what should I do?"
The doctor
replied, "Marry an accountant."
"Will that make me live longer?"
asked the patient.
"No," said the doctor, "but it will SEEM
longer."
Why do
accountants make good lovers?
They're great with figures.
"Careful with fire" is good advice we know.
"Careful with words" is ten times doubly so. William Carleton
"Do you know what a pessimist is?" "A man who thinks everybody is as nasty as himself, and hates them for it." George Bernard Shaw
"I meant," said Ipslore bitterly, "what is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?"
Death thought about it.
"Cats," he said eventually. "Cats are nice." Terry Pratchett