Cocktails 1 oz Bacardi® gold rum
1 oz Bacardi® Coco rum
4 oz pineapple juice
1 splash sweet and sour mix
Money
Business
Information
An accountant is having a hard time sleeping
and goes to see
his doctor. "Doctor, I just can't get to sleep at
night."
"Have you tried counting sheep?"
"That's the
problem - I make a mistake and then spend three hours
trying to find
it."
A patient was at her doctor's office after
undergoing a complete physical exam. The doctor said, "I have some
very grave
news for you. You only have six months to
live."
The patient asked, "Oh doctor, what should I do?"
The doctor
replied, "Marry an accountant."
"Will that make me live longer?"
asked the patient.
"No," said the doctor, "but it will SEEM
longer."
Why do
accountants make good lovers?
They're great with figures.
A dollar saved is a quarter earned. Oscar Levant
America is the country where you buy a lifetime supply of aspirin for one dollar and use it up in two weeks. John Barrymore
At my lemonade stand I used to give the first glass away free and charge five dollars for the second glass. The refill contained the antidote. Emo Phillips