Shots & Shooters 1 can Red Bull® energy drink
1 oz cherry vodka
Money
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A plane was taking off from Kennedy. After it
reached a
comfortable
cruising altitude, the captain made an
announcement over the
intercom, "Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your
captain speaking.
Welcome to
Flight number 293, non-stop from New
York to Los Angeles. The weather
ahead is good and therefore we
should have a smooth flight, Now sit
back
and relax. - OH MY
GOD!"
Silence
Then, the captain came back on the intercom and
said: "Ladies and
Gentlemen, I an so sorry if I scared you earlier,
but while I was
talking
the flight attendant brought me a cup
of coffee and spilled the hot
coffee
in my lap. You should see
the front of my pants!"
A passenger in Coach said: "That's
nothing. He should see the back of
mine!"
There is a new
Barbie doll on the market
- Marie Antionette Barbie ...with removable head;
guillotine
included
There is a new Barbie
doll on the market
- East German Swim Team Barbie ...a Barbie head on a
Ken doll
[Humanity] has unquestionably one really effective weaponlaughter. Power, money, persuasion, supplication, persecutionthese can lift at a colossal humbugpush it a littleweaken it a little, century by century; but only laughter can blow it to rags and atom Mark Twain
A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it. Bob Hope
A billion here, a billion there, pretty soon it adds up to real money. Senator Everett Dirksen