Cocktails 1 oz amaretto almond liqueur
1 oz vodka
3 oz Hpnotiq® liqueur
4 oz sweet and sour mix
4 oz 7-Up® soda
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Why do you need a driver's licence to
buy liquor when you can't
drink and drive?
One day an Englishman, an
American, and a Canadian walked into a pub together. The proceeded to
each buy a pint of Molson Canadian. Just as they were about to enjoy
their beverage three flies landed in each of their pints.
The Englishman pushed his beer away from him in disgust.
The
American fished the offending fly out of his beer and continued
drinking it as if nothing had happened.
The Canadian picked the fly
out of his drink and started shaking it
over the pint, yelling...
"SPIT IT OUT, SPIT IT OUT YOU BASTARD!!!"
A couple have not been getting along for years,
so the husband
thinks,
"I'll buy my wife a cemetery plot for
her birthday."
Well, you can imagine her disappointment.
The next
year, her birthday rolls around again and this
time he doesn't get
her anything.
She says, "Why didn't you get me a birthday
present!?"
He replies, "You didn't use what I got you last year!"
A boy can learn a lot from a dog: obedience, loyalty, and the importance of turning around three times before lying down. Robert Benchley
A conservative is a man with two perfectly good legs who, however, has never learned to walk forward. Franklin D. Roosevelt
A dollar saved is a quarter earned. Oscar Levant